Real Things Men on Tinder Have Told Me Behind the Protection of Their Computer Screens that Made Me Feel Cheap
Good morning, lovely
It’s nice to meet you
We matched so I had to say hi because cute girls like you are few
and far between
Thank God, I was wondering when I’d see a beautiful girl
You have a gorgeous smile
How’s your weekend going?
You wanna eat cookie dough together sometime?
I would love to take you home baby
Lemme get your number.
I like you
If you were a triangle, you’d definitely be a cute one!
You’re pretty cute for a black chick.
Are you Jamaican? Because you’re Jamaican me horny.
Your mother must have been a beaver
Because DAMMMM girl
You know, I’ve never been with a black girl before
Tell me about yourself. Hopefully you’re as interesting as your
We should get to know each other. It only makes sense right?
You know what goes really good with a marshmallow?
Chocolate–you look like a Nestlé girl. How much do you love nuts?
Or look, are you a pizza box?
Because I can’t wait to get your top off!
Sorry, I’m not good with chat up lines.
R u gonna answer me or what?
I’ve been messaging you I just want to talk–promise
It would be an honor to get to know you
Guess no lunchtime playtime for me today
Can I call you caramel? I love a lil caramel in the morning
Or are you more of a moca? Give me diabetis
Do you like gettin’ eaten out?
What can I do to make you snap me tonight?
I’ll literally make a fool out of myself.
I want to see you.
Show me dem titz
And then if you sit on my face
I’ll eat my way to your heart
I don’t know you, but I’ve never felt this way before
You seem different than the rest
Can we go out sometime please?
If you were a fruit, you’d be a fineapple
You trynna fuck tonight?
Because I can make you pornstar famous
Looks like we both did the RIGHT thing when we swiped
I’m tired of the games being single
I’m just a nice guy looking for a mean girl to corrupt me
I love having a beautiful woman around to try on.
Come cuddle babe
Let’s get drunk and make out
We should definitely meet up sometime.